Listen to yourself

Motivational speeches don’t do it for me, although this one will sound like one! Ironic.

If you’re going through a bad marriage or a horrible prolonging divorce, you probably need all the help, advice, and opinions you could get to help you decide or help you have peace with your decision. It’s ok to ask for people’s advice, it’s ok to get all the self-help books you can put your hand on, but for the love of God, don’t let advice or books block your own thoughts and instincts from getting to you.

Listen to yourself. Don’t look for comforts in other people’s words that tell you things you want to believe. Listen to advice, but only do by it when you think you’re ready; otherwise, you’ll never really move on, and your ghosts will keep haunting you and pulling you back from you approval-induced happy place back to your misery.

My dad always says: “la nadema man estashar, wala khaba man istakhar” (or the other way around, it always confuses me) but he also says “nakhod bel asbab”, and no one would know your reasons or understand them more than you.

Sorry if it’s too brief and direct to the extent that it almost feels like a slap on the face, it’s not!! But sometimes it’s better to get things that way to make sure they don’t get confusing or boring.

End of transmission.